Very Serious Policies
Alright. The jig is up.
You want policies? Fine. We’ll show you policies.
Not because we think politics needs more jargon —
but because we believe politics needs more joy.
This page contains the official policies of the New Zealand Party Party.
Yes, they have names. Yes, they’re written down.
And yes — they might make you smile.
Because behind every Act is something simple: a desire to care, to connect, to play.
We’re not here to argue or convince.
We’re here to invite.
If you’re tired of waiting for things to change…
If you’ve ever felt like joy doesn’t belong in government…
If you think fairy bread should be part of the national curriculum…
Then this is for you.
Official Acts of the New Zealand Party Party
The Sausage Act 2025
Guarantees free sausage sizzles at community events. Optional onions. Optional vegan.The Public Wizardry Act
Legalises spontaneous magic tricks in public and parliamentary spaces.The Jelly Tower Protection Act
Safeguards the structural integrity of all community-built jelly towers.The Emotional Regulation Through Poi and Slinkies Act
Supports toy-based wellbeing programs in schools.The National Glitter Resilience Framework
Distributes glitter, face paint, and bubbles during national emergencies.
These are real ideas.
They just haven’t been taken seriously — until now.
Let’s make the serious stuff a little more human.
Let’s make the human stuff a little more fun.
And if none of this is your thing — that’s okay.
There are plenty of other parties to choose from.
But if this speaks to you, even just a little…
you’re already part of it.