NZ PARTY PARTY: THE LOVE MANIFESTO
We are not Left.
We are not Right.
We are upwards and inwards — to the Heart of Aotearoa.
WHO WE ARE
We are not politicians.
We are not lobbyists.
We are not polite.
We are the barefoot circus walking through Parliament.
We are the glitter in the gears of the machine.
We are the child’s voice saying “the Emperor has no clothes.”
We are NZ PARTY PARTY — a joyful rebellion with no masters, no handlers, and no PR spin.
WHAT WE BELIEVE
The system is not broken.
It is operating exactly as intended —
To extract. To distract. To divide. To exhaust.
But love is not a fringe issue.
Joy is not a luxury.
And truth is not a liability.
We aren’t here to play the game.
We’re here to change the rules.
WHAT WE KNOW
Complexity is used to silence.
Bureaucracy is weaponised stagnation.
PR is the new colonialism.
Most “debates” are distractions.
Billionaires are kings without crowns.
We are peasants with microphones, fire poi, and glitter.
HOW WE RISE
We don’t wait for permission.
We bring cookies.
We hand out toys.
We hold free public festivals that remind people what together feels like.
We rise with:
Lolly scrambles in Parliament grounds
Fire shows to remind people they’re alive
School talks that teach the truth — not the curriculum
Satirical campaigns that land real policies
Media spins that spin back
We don’t posture — we play.
We don’t manipulate — we enchant.
We don’t extract — we give.
OUR POLICIES (Yes, They’re Real)
We don’t promise paradise.
We promise what’s possible, when people are not gaslit by systems built to numb them.
Housing as a Right
Ban land banking
Rent caps tied to local income
Tax vacant homes and luxury hoarding
Build beautiful public housing, not punishment boxes
Climate Sanity
Ban imported landfill products
Regenerative agriculture as standard
Nationalise energy
Carbon-negative by 2035
Liberatory Education
Teach philosophy, consent, and psychology by Year 9
Ban homework before age 15
Replace NCEA Level 1 with a Life Skills Certificate
Neurodiverse support as default, not exception
Healthcare = Wholeness
Free dental, therapy, and GP
National joy plan: hammocks, treehouses, and public dance
Ban corporate lobbying in health
Worker Dignity
4-day work week
Real living wage
End unpaid internships
Create national worker-owned co-ops
HOW WE SPEAK
We speak from the belly,
From the heart,
And from the joyful chaos of the child still alive inside us.
We speak:
With fire
With satire
With sincerity
With rage disguised as laughter
With love that does not beg for approval
We don’t water down the truth.
We don’t perform respectability.
We are what happens when joy gets organised.
OUR FINAL WORD
We are not here to be liked.
We are not here to win.
We are here to remind you that democracy was never supposed to feel like dread.
We are here to turn Parliament into a playground of possibility.
Join the movement.
Join the circus.
Join the sacred rebellion of joy.
This is NZ PARTY PARTY.
We are not here to run for office.
We are here to make Parliament run.